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May 2007

More on the Difference Between Men and Women


This is not funny!

Today's Confession: My Fetish (I am Not Alone)

The word for today is fetish. Hmmm…what is a fetish? Well, according to The Free Dictionary online:


1. An object that is believed to have magical or spiritual powers, especially such an object associated with animistic or shamanistic religious practices.

2. An object of unreasonably excessive attention or reverence: made a fetish of punctuality.

3. Something, such as a material object or a nonsexual part of the body, that arouses sexual desire and may become necessary for sexual gratification.

4. An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment; a fixation.

Well, I confess I have a fetish. Some of you may be disappointed because my fetish is not of a sexual nature. You can forget about #3 on the list above.

I have a handbag fetish. I can’t seem to get enough of them. I am rather selective though. I like designer handbags --- preferably Louis Vuitton and Coach --- but I am more into style and quality.

I have paid four figures for a handbag and as little as $5. A quality $5 handbag? Yes, you’d be surprised what you can find at a thrift store. Anyhoo, I surfed upon a blog that totally satisfies my handbag obsession. It’s called The Purse Blog.


I don’t know why some women obsess so about a handbag but I am amongst them. Check out the number of subscribers of The Purse Blog and you’ll see how many others feel as I do. I frequently check out the offerings on eLuxury but I actually buy a bag from them maybe every 18 months or so. Sometimes they offer free shipping which can be a great saving.

The Purse Blog also gives info on handbags (especially the fake designer bags) and provides info on bags rocked by celebrities. They even posted that pic of Lindsay Lohan slumped in her vehicle. I don’t think I’m as obsessed as they are because I really don’t care about the bag Lohan’s wearing when she’s in that condition, okay?

Chalk it Up to Ignorance Reigns, Wendy's Manager Shot Over Chili Sauce

Dogbert The manager of a Wendy's in Miami was shot over chili sauce. No, you didn't mis-read anything --- chili sauce. You know, sauce for that sodium-infested, pseudo-beef concoction that's sold as chili. Check their website for its nutritional content.

Some guy, orders at the drive-thru and demands extra chili. There is a limit on the condiments included with each order, most times condiments must be requested at the fast food joints here in South Florida. Now, sensing that homeboy was a straight up fool, about ten packets of chili were placed in his bag. Of course he acts like a horse's patootie --- no insult intended to the horse and shoots the manager who is trying to tell him that the extra sauce is in the bag.

The manager was only slightly injured but what is the world coming to? It's stupid crap like this that makes it bad for Miami Gardens, a newly-formed, predominantly black municipality in the Miami area. When major retailers don't want to set up shop in the Black community, incidents such as these cause decent, hard-working Black people to suffer and inconvenienced. There is no excuse for such behavior.

The  next time dude drives through Wendy's, he should not only be given extra sauce, give him some extra chili too. If he keeps eating too much chili it will likely make him sick anyway.

Mother Hangs Self and 4 Children; One Child Survives

What must that young mother in Texas have been thinking to hang her four beautiful daughters and herself? Such tragedy causes me to wonder what goes through the minds of many people that we pass in our neighborhoods or at our jobs each day.

Miraculously, the youngest of the girls, 8-month old Evelyn, survived. I pray for a life for her that is filled with peace, love and joy. Let us use our time on Earth to do good and help others; that does not mean that we should not protest but that our actions are always done out of love.

May God have mercy on their souls. Ashe'

Hangings stun women's shelter where woman stayed

Tagged, Again?!! Promise You Won’t Laugh at #8!

My BB (blog buddy) Maria tagged me again. I’m supposed to list 8 random facts about myself. Man, oh, man, I’ll try.

Here are the rest of the rules:

* Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
* Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.
* Players should tag eight other people and notify them that they have been tagged.

Random Facts About Vanessa

  1. I can’t sleep for more than 4 or 5 hours at a time unless I’m ill.
  2. I played Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz when I was in elementary school. I got to sing “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” and everything.
  3. I can sing “O Come All Ye Faithful” in Latin. One of my seventh grade teachers, Mrs. Kruger, taught us using a Bing Crosby record.
  4. I speak Greek (a little). Sagapo! (I love you.)
  5. My favorite colors are pink and black. My dream car is a black Mercedes convertible with custom ballet pink leather interior and woodgrain details.
  6. My wardrobe includes 7 black suits and 12 pair of black pants. Too much black, huh?
  7. I can’t swim. (I’m not proud of that.) I do know how to prevent myself from drowning though.
  8. I like rock and heavy metal music. I totally lose my mind when I hear Janet Jackson’s “Black Cat” and “Walk This Way” with Run DMC and Aerosmith. Yeah, 20 years later, I can still play a mean air guitar.

I’m not gonna tag anybody but this was really cool. I had an excuse to dance around the house and look really silly. LOL Thanks, Maria, I needed that!

Boo, If You Want, Miss USA makes Miss Universe Top Five

Ustop5 I didn’t watch the Miss Universe pageant. I’d intended to but got caught up in other things. Learning of Miss USA’s [Rachel Smith] fall during the evening gown segment was surprising and disappointing. She had an excellent chance of bringing home the crown.

I am tired of seeing video of Smith’s fall as I was when Carmen Electra fell while modeling in a fashion show and then the woman who came to assist fell also. What amazes me so about Smith is how she was able to regain her composure so quickly. She’s definitely a professional.

Surely Smith is embarrassed and emotionally bruised, if only for a moment. She went on to place in the Top Five and deservingly so. What I don’t get is the booing of Miss USA by the audience in Mexico City.

Do your children think they are bad? ugly? What you MUST teach them now.

People are Screwed Up Creatures

602_kiri Yesterday’s Oprah Winfrey was so very important because it was a peek into the world of children and young people and the devastation of a negative self-image on their psyche. Initially, the show started out with excerpts of the short film by then teenager Kiri Davis, “A Girl Like Me” [2005]. You may have seen the video as it has been in heavy circulation throughout the internet.

Kiri’s film reconstructed the famous test by Dr. Kenneth Clark in which young Black children were asked several questions while being shown a Black doll and a white doll. Astonishingly, the answers were very much the same as 50 years ago. As a Black person, watching that film was really painful.

Overwhelmingly, the children preferred the white doll over the Black doll. Names such as bad and ugly were attached to the Black doll while the white doll was nice and pretty. It was painfully clear that we haven’t instilled a positive self-image in Black children so we really haven't overcome in the last fifty years.

When the topic is race, I often think that White people sigh and think, “Here we go again.” I know that some do because race has been the topic of many conversations with Caucasian friends. I’ve found that some whites are pained and ashamed by slavery also. To know that their relatives committed atrocities against people strictly because of their skin color can be devastating to some whites but racism continues. 0000605

When Dr. Robin Smith talked about the pain young people feel today being inflicted, not by whites, but by the African-American community, most often the child’s own family, I thought I would scream. So true. It's happened and still does in my family. Finally, someone actually held Blacks accountable for contributing to the cycle of self-hatred. I'm a believer of knowing better and doing better. Someone has to break the cycle.

Every time Blacks refer to straight hair as good hair and kinky hair as bad hair, we continue the cycle of pain. The same holds true for light skin and dark skin or light-colored eyes and dark eyes.

When you are white and represent the majority race, you just don’t get it. You don’t understand the pain a little Black child feels and carries with him or her to inflict upon their own children and the cycle continues.

Suchin To understand the breadth of the devastation of a negative self-image was to listen to the conversation of MTV’s SuChin Pak. Okay, who knew about Asian people and this thing of no crease in their eyelid? I was and am still amazed by that. Many Asians want to look European (white) so eyelid surgery is big business. SuChin spoke of trying to fit in with her white friends as a child. People are screwed up creatures.

Oprah Winfrey is trying to do something about negative self-image of teenage girls. Hopefully, this initiative will have a positive effect. Next, we have to deal with the media that fails to promote the beauty in all of us.

As I watched Oprah’s Show, you know what I thought? Oprah really could be president of the United States in 2016. She’s tapping into a potential voting base (today’s teenage girls) that could make that possibility a reality.

Joke of the Day

If you've ever worked for a boss that reacts before getting the facts and thinking things through, you will love this!

A large company, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning on a wall. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business.

He walked up to the guy leaning against the wall and asked, "TELL ME How MUCH MONEY DO YOU MAKE A WEEK?"

A little surprised, the young man looked at him and replied, "I make $400 a week. Why?"

The CEO then handed the guy $1,600 in cash and screamed, "Here's four weeks' pay, now GET THE HELL OUT and don't come back."

Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO looked around the room and asked, "Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-ball did here?"

From across the room came a voice, "Pizza delivery guy from Domino's."

Freedom is not Free: My Memorial Day Tribute and Rant

"This week the Pentagon released the names of 35 soldiers killed..."

George Stephanopulos uttered those words on his show yesterday. It hurts to know of such tragic loss of life. I won't go into the why and how. At least, I'll try not to.

This post is in tribute to all the soldiers that died for us in every war so that folks like me have the right to voice our dissent. I've met veterans from WWII, VietNam, Desert Storm, Iraq, Iran, you get the picture. I am truly humbled by their courage and sacrifice. Those that died, paid a tremendous price. I thank them.

I know that Freedom is not Free but what price is to be paid? Someone please remind me why we are still in the Middle East and haven't found any weapons of mass destruction. It just doesn't make any sense. This latest war is not about freedom. I remembered that as I've done for the last three years, reflecting upon the death of Sgt. Edmund L. "Dakie" Randle.

You see, when George Stephanopulos utters those words --- "This week the Pentagon released the names ..."  --- and you know the person whose name flashes on the screen, this latest war takes on a new significance. When you know the young man that will never come home was in the military just to be able to complete his college education, this latest war sucks.

I thought of little Dakie and the more than 3,000 other Americans who lost their lives as I went to the gas station yesterday and paid $3.35 per gallon of gas. Yeah, freedom is not free and neither is this war over oil.

Sgt. Edmund L. "Dakie" Randle, Jr.
Florida A&M University
Marching 100
Miami, Florida

Killed January 17, 2004
Bradley fighting vehicle struck an improvised explosive device (IED) near Taji,
about 20 miles north of Baghdad

Continue reading "Freedom is not Free: My Memorial Day Tribute and Rant" »

Vanessa: Unplugged! has moved to TypePad...There goes the neighborhood!

J0430674_2 Okay, I've moved Vanessa: Unplugged! to the TypePad blogging format. I really like the professional look of the templates and the flexibility in customizing them without using TypePad's more complicated "Advanced Templates". I'm trying to do "stress-free" blogging, you know. I'm sure I'll move to Advanced Templates soon, y'all know I have ADD when it comes to my blog design. LOL

There are some things that Blogger still does way better than TypePad; I'll blog about that later. If I had more readers and made different decisions on the front end, this move may not have been so attractive. For me, and my limited HTML, XML and CSS knowledge, TypePad definitely has its advantages. Anyhoo, there are a few things that I must do today, hopefully I can get back to this blog with my pros and cons on TypePad vs. Blogger.

I'm still tweaking an issue with changing the CNAME records of my domain name over at Network Solutions so that the "www" prefix is not necessary. I was using web-forwarding of "" to "". Web-forwarding was not a good idea. Thus far, two phone calls have not resolved the problem. I'll let you know how that turns out too.

One last thing, I need help with code I can add over on Blogger to automatically redirect readers to this new address. If you can help, please leave info in comments. Thanks.